Recently my wife Lani and I published our first book together. It’s called What Girls Need to Know About Guys, and then when you flip it over there’s another front cover that says, What Guys Need to Know About Girls. So it’s kind of like two books in one.
I thought it might be fun to share a little bit about how this book came to be.
It probably started with some experiences that my wife and I had speaking together at Especially for Youth (EFY). On a certain day of the week there is a time where we would speak just to the young women, and then turn around and speak just to the young men. We would speak on a variety of topics, but noticed that one theme that was especially powerful for the young women was helping them understand who they really are as daughters of God. Along with that we would talk about some issues dealing with boys. The young men of course were always interested in learning more about girls! One year we focused on the importance of honoring and respecting women.
We shared this quote from President Hinckley with both the young men and women: “Woman is God’s supreme creation….Of all the creations of the Almighty, there is none more beautiful, none more inspiring than a lovely daughter of God.” We found that when the young women understood who they really are, and the young men treated them this way, wonderful things happened. This note, from an EFY participant illustrates this:
“You probably don’t remember me, but I met you at EFY. That week changed me. What changed me the most was when all the guys were perfect gentleman. I wasn’t used to be treated that nicely. As the week went by I watched as guys held open doors and such to the other girls. For the first time in my life I felt like a queen.”
Lani began teaching a class at EFY called “Expect the Respect” where she continued to focus on what it means for young women to respect themselves and to expect guys to respect them as well. She also talked with the guys about how to show young women that they are valued and appreciated.The response that she got from these classes was incredible.
Our intention in writing the book was to recreate some of those experiences. We hope that young women who read it learn more about how guys think, and also realize that who they are as daughters of God matters much more than whether or not they get asked by the right boy to Prom. We hope that young men who read it will learn not only new things about how the female mind works, but also understand the power that comes when they honor young women as daughters of God.
We were gratified by this review of the book that says, “In reading the book you feel like you are at a fireside listening to both John and Lani speak.” We hope that those who read the book feel that we are having a conversation together, and that the conversation is helpful. If you’re interested in learning more, you can see some excerpts from the book or get a copy.